Sports Night Season Three

Episode 3.3: General Benjamin Bradley

2008-12-17T00:40:00.000-08:00

“General Benjamin Bradley
Episode 3.3

Previously on Sports Night

Dana
This is really becoming a problem though, Isaac.

Isaac
I know. And it’ll still be a problem tomorrow. Stop worrying about it.

Dana
OK. But—

Isaac
Stop worrying about it. (Pauses and looks at her) Is everything alright?

And the Nominees Are…
************************************************************************
Dan (to Rebecca)
I’m glad you’re here.

Rebecca
Me too.

(Casey and Dan start walking)

Casey (watching Dan)
She really likes you, huh?

Dan
It’s almost hard to believe

And the Nominees Are…

************************************************************************
Casey
CSC is releasing a statement in the morning. They finalized the papers. We’re officially sold.

Dana (she is visibly shocked and doesn’t look happy)
We are?

And the Nominees Are…

*******************************************************************************

General Benjamin Bradley
Episode 3.3

(Dan and Abbey are sitting in Abbey’s office. Abbey looks frustrated as Dan speaks.)

Dan
I want to tell you a story.

Abbey
Then get an apartment in Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood. I’m not your niece, Dan, I’m your therapist.

Dan
Which is why I think you’ll benefit from this story.

Abbey
Is the story at least about you?

Dan
It’s partially about me. It’s partially about Dana. It’s partially about a Civil War general named Benjamin Bradley.

Abbey
Alright.

Dan
It’s mostly about the fact that QVV is just a really stupid acronym. (Abbey stares at him) It’s a good story, Abbey.

Abbey
When does it take place?

Dan
A long, long time ago in a village far away.

Abbey
Or?

Dan
Last month.

Abbey
After the ESPY Awards?

Dan (shaking his head)
Last month was the S.P.A.s

Abbey
That’s what I’m saying, right? The ESPY Awards? The ESPYAs?

Dan (smiling in realization)
No, not the ESPYAs. It’s the S…P…As. The ESPYs are something totally different.

Abbey
Is any of this the point of your story?

Dan
I don’t know. What were we talking about again?

Abbey
We were talking about the fact that you fired me.

Dan
See, that’s not the way I remember it.

Abbey
Well, that’s very revisionist of you, Herodatus, but you fired me. I still have the voicemail to prove it.

Dan
I come in here twice a month.

Abbey
Yes.

Dan
Last month I came in once and then you went on vacation.

Abbey
Yes.

Dan
And now you’re back from the Cayman Islands – with a very nice tan I might add – and I am resuming my bi-weekly schedule.

Abbey
Yes.

Dan
So?

Abbey
See, you’re leaving out the important detail that while I was on vacation you fired me.

Dan
And now I’m back.

Abbey
But you still fired me.

Dan
I think you’re focusing way too much on that.

Abbey
Whereas I should be focusing on the story of Benjamin Bradley?

Dan
Actually, you’re going to start out focusing on the letter V.

Abbey
Why V?

Cut to—one month earlier: Natalie and Casey are walking together from the control room into the newsroom as they talk

Natalie
Because Dana says it’s V.

Casey
V?

Natalie
Yep.

Casey
Not C?

Natalie
She says V.

Casey (making a face)
V? It’s a V?

Natalie
That’s the word on the street.

Casey
You’re sure?

Natalie
About what?

Casey (looks confused)
What do you mean about what? What are we talking about?

Natalie
You asked me if I was sure. I’m sure that Dana told me it was a V. But if your question is “am I sure it is a V” I can’t answer that because I only know what Dana told me.

Casey
Which is that—

Natalie
It’s a V.

Casey
I don’t know. QVV is just a weird name for a television station.

Natalie
Well you better get used to it. You know why?

Casey (stops walking and turns and looks at her)
Because it’s ours now.

Natalie (gives small smile and raises her eyebrows)
Bingo.

(Natalie breaks off and goes the opposite direction as Casey walks into the editing room)

(Dan is sitting in the editing room staring at the monitor.)

Casey
Dana says it’s V.

Dan (absently)
OK.

Casey
Are you listening to me?

Dan
Does this look like holding to you?

Casey (looking at the screen)
No, not really.

Dan
That’s what I thought. That’s exactly what I thought. (Shakes his head and gives a small laugh) It’s starting, Casey.

Casey
I have no idea what you’re talking about and I can assure you, I don’t want to find out.

Dan
The universe is smiting me.

Casey
But it looks like I’m going to find out anyway.

Dan
Things with Rebecca are going to be good. She came over last night after the awards. We talked. She stayed over. Things are good with Rebecca, Casey.

Casey
So what’s the problem?

Dan
Things are good with Rebecca.

Casey
Your problems are different than other people’s, Danny.

Dan
The universe has to achieve balance. Good things are afoot for me, so the universe had to even the metaphysical playing field. The universe is talking to me, Case, and it’s saying there’s no such thing as a free lunch.

Casey
And it’s saying that by making sure that the Detroit Lions, a team to which you have no connection, got a bogus holding call?

Dan
The natural state of the universe is balance. The smart money said Rebecca and I were done, but we’ve managed to stay together. This has thrown the universe out of balance. Now the universe has to compensate by making bad things happen. It’s a complicated theory, Casey.

Casey
Yeah, so complicated I don’t think you’re entirely grasping it.

Dan
The natural state of the universe—

Casey
Please don’t explain it to me again.

Dan
The natural state of the universe—

Casey
Uh, Yoda? Do you think there might be another explanation for why the officials blew
a call at the Lions game than the fact that you have a girlfriend?

Dan
No, Casey, I do not.

Casey
Yeah, I think you should let this go.

Dan
I’ll let it go when the universe lets it go.

Casey
I’m going away now.

(Casey walks out of the editing room, but Dan follows him. Casey stops and turns and sees Dan staring at him and rolls his eyes).
Casey
Hi.

Dan
How ya doin?

(Casey continues walking toward their office and Dan follows)

Casey
Well, I’m fine, but I’m not the one the universe has chosen to smite.

Dan
You’re going to see that I’m right.

Casey
You’ve given this way too much thought. You know what you should do?

Dan
What?

Casey
Let it go.

Dan
I can't let it go, Case, it's bigger than both of us.

Casey
The universe?

Dan
Yes.

Casey
It is bigger than both of us.

Dan
That's what I'm telling you.

Casey
It's infinite, Danny. Much like, apparently, the length of this
conversation.

Dan
Casey, this happens. Things are good and then they just have a way of imploding.

Casey
You think that you and Rebecca are going to implode?

Dan
Things are going well.

Casey
They are.

Dan
This is usually the time the wheels come off the wagon for me, but I'm fine.

Casey
I'd get a second opinion on that.

(Elliot walks by on his way to the studio)

Elliot
Hey, we have to redo the intro in the 20s. Missett collapsed.

Casey
No kidding? (Elliot shakes his head as he keeps walking. Casey turns to Dan.)You have anything to do with that one?

Dan
I’m not going to get any support from you on this, am I?

Casey
I can’t see how you possibly could. Hey, before I forget, I can’t make it tonight. I have Charlie.

Dan
You have Charlie next weekend.

Casey
He wanted to switch; apparently he has something he needs to talk to me about. His school is having a dance for the fifth and sixth graders. I think he needs to talk about a girl.

Dan (grinning)
Really?

Casey (looking nervous)
Didn’t that happen kind of early?

Dan
He's almost 10. It's not that early for a first crush. [a beat] Do you need me to talk to him for you?

Casey
My son? Do I need you to talk to my son for me?

Dan
Yeah

Casey
No, Danny, thanks, I think I can handle it.

Dan
I’m just saying. He might need advice from someone who’s a little more successful than you are in the ways of love.

Casey
You think your relationship is responsible for the wrath of the universe. I think I can handle it.

Dan
Suit yourself. [a beat] QVV? Are you sure it’s not C?

Casey
Pretty sure.

Dan
Whatever. QVV is just a weird name for a network.

Cut to—Conference Room
Everyone except for Isaac is seated around the table for the rundown

Dana
Vision. It stands for Quo Vadimus Vision and I really can’t get over how stupid that sounds.

Kim
I think it’s nice.

Dana
Sports Night on Quo Vadimus Vision. It’s too long. Don’t you think it’s too long?

Casey
Yeah, but we’ll probably just shorten it to QVV.

Dana
Vision? The V was bad enough, but it stands for vision? What kind of V in any name has ever stood for vision?

Casey (laughing)
I don’t think the V is T.V. is going anywhere.

Dana
Yeah, moving on. Bumpers in and out at—

Jeremy
Wait, what else?

Dana
What else what?

Jeremy
You and Isaac met with reps from Quo Vadimus all morning and the only thing you have to report from the meeting with our new owners is their name?

Dana (setting down her pencil)
Calvin Tregar will be involved with programming—

Casey
How involved?

Dana
Well, I’m not sure, but my guess would be, more involved than we want him to be.

Casey
Great.

Dana
Hey, we’ve been here before. CSC? Luther Sachs? We got through that and we’ll get through this. Now, Calvin is currently out of the country, but Richard Briggs, who is his J.J., wants to come by the show tonight. (She shrugs) We’ll take it from there. The important thing right now is to think positive.

(Everyone is quiet for a minute)

Natalie
Well this is gonna suck.

Dana
It really is.

Casey
Bright side? I think we can blame it on Dan.

Jeremy
What did Dan do?

Casey
I’m not clear on the details, but essentially he had sex and cursed us all.

Dan
It’s not—

Natalie
Danny, I think you might be doing wrong.

Cut to—Abbey’s Office

Abbey
This is a good story.

Dan
I figured you’d like that.

Abbey
You are all extremely resistant to change.

Dan
Everyone’s resistant to change.

Abbey
Change can be good, Dan.

Dan
See, people say that, but they don’t mean what they want you to think they mean. I say, “change can be good” and what you think is, “wow, he’s well adjusted.” But what I mean is “maybe this change will only affect the stuff I didn’t like anyway.”

Abbey
I think you’re probably right. People get used to things. It’s in our nature to form habits that are hard to let go of.

Dan
It’s more than that. We get used to being certain people. We get used to the identities. They can be destructive identities, but we cling to them because they’re ours. They’re who we are. It’s a hard thing to let go of, Abbey.

Abbey (looking at Dan curiously)
What’s this story about, Dan?

Dan
General Benjamin Bradley.

Cut back to—One month earlier: Dan and Casey’s office.
(Casey is at his desk writing when Jeremy walks in.)

Jeremy
Hey.

Casey
Hey. What’s up?

Jeremy
I’m waiting on Natalie to approve my segment on the Chargers.

Casey
Did you hear? Misset collapsed.

Jeremy
I know. This segment is a fill.

Casey
Did you need me?

Jeremy
Dan said you needed some help.

Casey
Is Bariano playing with a pulled hamstring or a torn ligament?

Jeremy
Neither. He’s not playing at all. He pulled his hamstring and it’s worse than they thought. Vashnivik is their shooter tonight. They’re saying he’ll be back, but it looks like Vashnivik’ll probably start the season.

Casey
Bariano, Misset…the Yankees might get rained out…is anything we talked about in this morning’s rundown still true?

Jeremy
It’s still a V.

Casey
Yeah.

Jeremy
Bariano wasn’t what Dan thought you needed help with though. He thinks you need help with Charlie.

Casey
I do not need help with Charlie

Jeremy
That’s not what Dan says.

(Casey walks out of the office to where Dan is standing at the copy machine)

Casey (standing next to Dan and turning to Jeremy)
Of the two of us, who knows more about my life, me or Dan?

Dan (gives a small laugh)
Seriously?

Casey (yelling)
I do not need help giving advice to my son! (looks at Dan) Can you please drop this?

Dan
Fine.

Casey (surprised)
Thank you.

Dan
It’s dropped.

(Dan starts to walk away and then turns back)

Dan
Oh, I forgot, Lisa called. Charlie wanted to come by here tonight to talk to you and then the nanny is taking him to your place. He’ll be here at 6.

Casey (stunned)
He’s coming now?

Dan
Casey?

Casey
I need help giving advice to my son.

Dan
This is what I’m saying.

(Dan follows Casey back into their office and gestures to Jeremy who follows as well)

Cut to—Isaac’s Office

(Dana and Natalie walk into Isaac’s office. Isaac is talking with another man who stands when the women enter the room)

Isaac
Dana, Natalie, I’d like you to meet Richard Briggs, who works with Calvin Tregar. He’ll be Quo Vadimus’ representative at today’s budget meeting.

Dana (extends her hand)
Nice to meet you. I’m Dana Whitaker, Executive Producer of Sports Night, and this is Natalie Hurley, my Senior AP.

Natalie
Nice to meet you.

Richard (shaking their hands)
It’s very nice to meet you both. Dana, I’ve heard fantastic things from Calvin. (Turning to Natalie) I didn’t realize the Senior AP attended budget meetings.

Natalie
It’s actually my first one (looking at Dana) we just decided—

Dana
I can’t imagine you have a problem with my decision to have her attend these meetings, Richard.

Richard
I’m sorry. I wasn’t clear. I’m glad to see it. I think it’s wise to have your second-in-command attending. It’s a good investment in the future of the show.

Dana
We should get started.

Richard
Actually, I…I don’t really have anything for you right now. Someone was supposed to have called you earlier. We haven’t approved a budget yet, but I can tell you this. Your budget will substantially improve with Quo Vadimus. We can talk about it in more detail next month when our board meets, but you can expect raises for the staff and a much larger operating budget.

Dana
And much of that money will be coming from West Coast Update?

Richard
Well, nothing has been made final yet—

Dana
But much of that money will be coming from West Coast Update.

Richard
It’s most likely that Quo Vadimus will be cutting West Coast Update and reorganizing our programming to serve our West Coast viewers. We will likely be rerunning portions of Sports Night with on location reporters filling in the rest and updating the late scores, yes.

Dana
And putting Sally Sasser, Peter Lasker, and Paul Schapp out of a job. To say nothing of the rest of the staff working on the show.

Richard
I hope you understand, Dana, this isn’t a decision we came to lightly. But at the end of the day, we had to think about what made more sense. And Sports Night had too much potential to remain as underfunded as it has been. I do understand, though, that because of how close-knit a network can become, people at Sports Night may take this hard.

Dana
Yeah.

Richard (eying Dana)
Though, honestly, given what I’ve heard about your relationship with Sally, I didn’t expect you to take it quite so hard.

Dana (looking surprised)
With all due respect, I think you have no idea what the hell you’re talking about.

Richard
With all due respect, I think you know that I do.

(There is uncomfortable silence for a minute and Natalie looks down while Richard and Dana stare at each other)

Richard (clearing his throat)
I apologize that we didn’t get word to you sooner that a budget wouldn’t be finalized yet. I’ll let you know by the end of the day when we can meet next month to talk about specifics. It was very nice to meet you all.

Isaac
Thank you, Richard

(Richard leaves and Isaac looks at Dana)

Isaac
I honestly don’t think he meant anything by it, Dana.

Dana
I think we should talk seriously about bringing some people on from West Coast Update to ease their transition.

Isaac
I think that’s a good idea. We’ll talk about it. How’s tonight looking?

Natalie
Bariano’s done. Probably till post-season.

Dana
Damn.

Isaac (looking at Dana)
He’s young. He’ll be back.

Dana
He was supposed to start this season. Everyone was saying –

Isaac
He’ll start next season.

Dana (looking distracted)
He’ll…yeah. We’ll talk about West Coast Update?

Isaac
Yeah.

Dana
OK. (smiling and turning to Natalie). Let’s go.

(They leave and Isaac looks after them concerned).

Cut to -Dan and Casey’s Office

(Jeremy, Dan, and Casey are sitting around the office talking about Charlie)

Casey
I don’t know what to tell him. He’s going to ask me how to get women and I don’t know what to tell him because I don’t know how to get women. I have no experience on which to draw.

Dan
True.

Casey
I thought you were supposed to be helping.

Dan
Lisa.

Casey
I honestly don’t remember. I mean, I remember our first date, I remember…I don’t remember how I got her to go out with me.

Jeremy
Sally.

Casey
Sally!

Dan
Do you really want to advise your ten-year-old son to get a girl drunk?

(Kim walks in)

Kim
I got a message that you needed to see me?

Casey
Kim! How do men get you?

Kim
They spend money on me.

Jeremy
How about when you were younger?

Kim
They spent money on me.

Casey
Thanks, Kim.

(Kim walks out as Natalie walks in)

Natalie
What’s up?

Casey
Natalie, how do I get women?

Natalie
Me. I get your women.

Casey
When have you ever gotten me women?

Natalie
I got you Dana.

Casey (rolls his eyes)
Yeah. I’ve been meaning to thank you for that. Hey, what about you? How did you get Jeremy to notice you?

Natalie
I threw myself at him.

Casey
OK, this is not helping.

Natalie
Rundown’s in five minutes, and Dan, the car will be out front right after to take you over to take you to Shea Stadium. Dana wants me to remind you—

Dan
I know.

Natalie
Stick to the approved questions.

Dan
When I said, “I know,” I meant that—

Natalie
Luke Cunningham, Danny.

Dan
I only went off the approved questions with Cunningham because I was sure he was considering a post season trade.

Natalie
Yeah, but what happened?

Dan
I was wrong.

Natalie
So he wasn’t so much considering a post season trade as he was?

Dan
Not considering a post season trade.

Natalie
And then what happened?

Dan
We not only looked liked idiots, but we never got the pre-interview questions we were supposed to get.

Natalie
So today you’re going to?

Dan
Stick to the approved questions.

Natalie (smiling)
Thank you. Five minutes.

Cut to – Isaac’s Office

(Casey walks in and Isaac looks up from his desk)

Casey
You weren’t at the rundown.

Isaac
Did you need me at the rundown?

Casey
No. I was just noting. So.

Isaac (looking up confused)
So?

Casey
How did you get Esther to marry you?

Isaac (eyes Casey and then gets up silently and heads for his bar)
You know why I hate the Mets?

Casey
You were a Brooklyn fan. You were pissed when they left.

Isaac
No. [a beat] Well, yes, but that’s why I usually hate them. You know why I hate them today?

Casey (realizing)
Because Dan’s at Shea Stadium.

Isaac (reaches the bar and pours a drink)
Whenever one of you is on assignment the other one always wanders in here with something ridiculous to bother me about.

Casey
Charlie’s going to come here tonight and ask me how to get women and I don’t have any clue.

Isaac
Ask a woman.

Casey
Yeah, I guess I could try that. (Starts to leave). I’ll see you.

Isaac
Casey. (Casey turns back). You’re his father – there’s no way you can screw this one up. He idolizes you.

Casey
Thanks. Isaac, how did you get Esther –

Isaac (simply)
I’m good with women.

Casey (rolls his eyes)
Of course you are. (Leaves)

Cut to – Dana’s Office

(Dana is sitting at her office when Richard knocks on the open door)

Dana
Richard. I thought you left.

Richard
I did. But I’d really like to watch the show tonight. I mean, here at the studio.

Dana (she clears her throat)
I don’t have a problem with that. But I don’t want my team to feel like they’re being evaluated.

Richard
Well, we’re always being evaluated, Dana. We’re competing with two other shows.

Dana
You know what I mean, Richard.

Richard
I’d like to watch the show as a fan, Dana. I’m not here to report back to the network. Believe it or not, I like Sports Night. Do you have a problem with me?

Dana
I have a problem with people telling me and my staff how to do our jobs. The jobs we’ve been doing well for almost four years now. The jobs we love.

Richard
My job is to help you! You know, this isn’t my first rodeo, Dana. I worked in broadcast sports for four years as a reporter and then was EP for six before I met Calvin. I know what it’s like to be in your chair. But when I used to do it, we looked at our competition as the enemy, and the network as our home.

Dana (clearly angry)
Follow me.

(Dana gets up and walks out of her office through the newsroom and into the control room. Richard follows her).

Dana (pointing at her chair)
You see that? That’s my chair. That’s my chair. That’s where I’ve sat for going on four years every night. I’ve lived and died with this show. And we’ve been counted out over and over again. You were EP at Fox for a tiny show that never needed to be anything besides better than the infomercial it was up against. We compete with ESPN and Fox nightly for a coveted spot and demo. And we’ve been underfunded, underappreciated, and underestimated every night. You have no idea what it’s like to sit in my chair.

(Richard looks at her and walks out. Dana sits down in her chair).

Cut to - Newsroom

(Casey walks out of Isaac’s office into the newsroom and sees Rebecca sitting in his and Dan’s office)

Casey
Hey, Rebecca.

Rebecca (standing up quickly)
Hey, Casey. I was just—I don’t really know which desk is which so I was just…

Casey (shrugging)
No problem. We don’t really know that either. I usually just work on whichever one is cleaner.

Rebecca
Oh. OK.

Casey
You know, you can wait in here, but Dan’s doing a pre-interview for the Mets feature tonight and, I’m not really sure when he’ll be back.

Rebecca
I actually was waiting for you.

Casey (surprised)
Oh. What’s up?

Rebecca
I’m done with Steve, Casey.

Casey (confused)
Okay?

Rebecca
That came out differently than I meant it but—

Casey
You’re done with Steve.

Rebecca
I am.

Casey
OK.

Rebecca
I just – I didn’t want you thinking that I’m going to break his heart. I know you guys are – I didn’t want you thinking I’m going to break his heart.

Casey (smiling)
I appreciate that.

Rebecca
I can head out—

Casey
Rebecca, you like Dan, don’t you?

Rebecca
Very much.

Casey
But why? How did Dan get you to like him?

Rebecca
He followed me around and asked me out constantly until he wore me down.

Casey
Danny stalked you, Natalie threw herself at Jeremy…the relationships in this building are not helpful.

Rebecca
Healthy. You meant to say the relationships in this building are not healthy.

Casey (turning to leave)
Yeah, that too. (Casey stops and turns back) You should wait for him here. He’d like that.

Rebecca
Thanks.

Casey
Thank you…for the other thing, I mean.
(Casey leaves and Rebecca smiles and sits back down at the desk in the office)

Cut to – the Control Room
(Casey walks into the control room where Dana is still sitting in her chair. Casey stands next to her. They both stare into the studio instead of looking at each other).

Dana
He’s almost here. It took you this long to come to me?

Casey
I didn’t think you’d have any insight.

Dana
I have the most insight, Casey. (She looks at him for a moment and then turns back to the studio) I remember how you got Lisa to like you.

Casey (smiles at her)
How?

Dana
Me. I talked to her for you (Casey begins to nod as she says this)

Casey
I had completely forgotten.

Dana (standing up)
So (she clears her throat). There ya go.

(Dana starts to walk out and Casey speaks without turning around)

Casey
How did I get you, Dana?

Dana
You didn’t.

Casey (turning to face her)
No, I know we never actually—

Dana
No. I mean, you didn’t get me to like you. You didn’t have to. (Dana walks out and Casey looks out after her)

(Casey walks into his and Dan’s office where Dan and Rebecca are sitting)

Casey (grinning)
Hey.

Dan
You’re happy.

Casey
I am happy.

Dan
You know what you’re gonna tell Charlie?

Casey
I’m going to tell him that McCall men aren’t good at getting women to like them. So the trick is finding the ones you don’t have to convince.

(Natalie walks in)

Natalie
Charlie’s on his way his up.

Casey (smiling)
I’m going to go and talk to my son.

Natalie
Isaac wanted Dana.

Casey
She’s in the control room.

(Casey and Natalie walk out of the office. Casey heads for the elevators and Natalie heads for the control room. They give each other five as they separate).

Cut to – Isaac’s Office

(Dana walks in and before she can say anything, Isaac speaks)

Isaac
I want you to give Richard, Calvin, and QVV a break.

Dana
Did you talk to someone?

Isaac
No. I’m talking to you.

Dana
Isaac –

Isaac
I mean it, Dana.

Dana (pauses and then looks scared)
I just don’t trust them yet, Isaac.

Isaac
Dana?

Dana
What?

Isaac
You know the story of General Benjamin Bradley?

Dana
Is this one of those stories you tell where the moral is leave you alone and let you work?

Isaac (gives a short laugh)
No. It’s a real story. Sit down.

(Dana sits and Isaac looks at her.)

Cut to – Abbey’s Office

Dan
Dana told me this story that night after the show. That’s when I decided that my firing you may have been premature.

Abbey
Who was Benjamin Bradley?

Cut to – Isaac’s Office

Isaac
Benjamin Bradley was a general during the Civil War. He fought for the Union, but the rest of his family fought for the South.

Dana
Why?

Isaac
It worked like that sometimes.

Dana
What did he do that was so important?

Isaac
He ended the Civil War.

Dana
See, then, I’m pretty sure I would have heard of him.

Cut to – Abbey’s Office

Dan
Not the way he ended it.

Cut to – Isaac’s Office

Dana
But he ended the Civil War? Why wasn’t he famous?

Cut to – Abbey’s Office

Dan
Benjamin Bradley was only nineteen when he joined the army and he joined as a private. His first battle was in 1861 in Athens. It was a small battle because the Union soldiers who were there were actually needed in Lexington. They were marching through, and they were attacked; completely outnumbered and completely outarmed.

Cut to – Isaac’s Office

Isaac
Bradley’s CO told him the real battle was in Lexington and that all they needed was to get by. But Bradley didn’t see it like that. He said “the real battle is where I stand.” And he led his men to victory in the Battle of Athens. He was placed in charge of his squad, but he didn’t get a promotion. His CO said he wasn’t ready. He was at a place called HJigh Bridge in Northern Virginia when he was made general. He was outnumbered three to one, but he was going to have his men fight. Then he received word that something was happening, but they didn’t know what. So he had to make a choice.

Cut to – Abbey’s Office

Dan
So he had to make a choice.

Cut to – Isaac’s Office

Isaac
He could charge ahead, and see if he could pull off another miraculous victory, or he could wait. And he waited. He told his men to stand their ground, but to wait. The next day Lee surrendered.

Cut to – Abbey’s Office

Dan
See, the Confederate soldiers were carrying badly needed rations to the capitol, and if Bradley’s men had fought and lost, they would have marched to Richmond and Lee never have surrendered to Grant.

Cut to – Isaac’s Office

Isaac
Benjamin Bradley was made a general the day the war ended.

Dana
Isaac, I don’t –

Isaac

You’re most comfortable when you’re fighting.

Dana

That’s not true, Isaac. That’s not – I just got used to fighting.

Isaac

I know it started that way. Dana, you’re a beautiful, blond woman in sports. It’s an occupational hazard. You were too young for your job and your job was to run a show that was destined to fail. You’ve been the underdog for so long, you forgot how to be anything else. And now even when things can be easy for you, you create situations so they’re not. Like that stupid-ass dating plan.

Dana

How did you know about the –

Isaac (gives a small laugh)

Dana the things I hear about around here that I wished I hadn’t... Dana, those people will go to battle with absolutely anyone you tell them to. And I know you’ll go to battle for them. But they don’t need a hero right now. They need a general.

Dana
I don’t know how to be a general.

Isaac

Yes you do. You just don’t know it yet.

Dana (nodding)
I’m going to ask Richard to stay for the show tonight.

Isaac
Good.

Dana
Good show, Isaac.

Isaac
Good show.

Cut to – Abbey’s Office

Abbey
So you don’t know how to deal with being happy. The thing with Rebecca. That's your...you don't know how to deal with being happy. That’s a huge realization, Dan.

Dan
So you can fix me?

Abbey
Well, hiring me back was certainly a step in the right direction.

Dan
What’s the next step?

Abbey
Working on it.

Cut to – Conference room

(Dana walks by and looks in and sees Richard pacing in the conference room talking to himself. He’s clearly practicing a conversation he wants to have with her. She smiles and stand in the doorway watching him)

Richard (to himself)
You seem to be under the impression that I’m out to get you and that’s just –

Dana (standing in the doorway)
I thought you left.

Richard (surprised)
I – how long have you been standing there?
Dana
Richard, I’m –

Richard
No. I’m going to say this.

Dana (sitting down)
Alright.

Richard
I’ve been watching you guys all day today and the unyielding loyalty you display is –

Dana
Impressive.

Richard
Stupid. Loyalty is great, but it presupposes that someone else is out to get you and I’m not. Natalie knew you were being crazy during that meeting, but she wouldn’t dare say that in front of me, so she let you pick a fight that didn’t need to be picked. You were so busy proving to me that you would choose even Sally Sasser over me, that it didn’t even register that I had just told you everyone on your staff is getting a raise.

Dana
You think we should be less wary of new people.

Richard
I think that if you were all stuck in a burning building every last one of you would suffocate to death, demanding that everyone else take the last breath before it would ever occur to any of you to open a window.

Dana
Wow.

Richard
I’m on your side.

Dana (comes closer to Richard and they look in each other’s eyes as they speak)
I know.

Richard
You know?

Dana
You said “we.” [off Richard’s look] You said “we’re up against two other shows.” And “we’re always being evaluated.” You said we. You’re on our side.

Richard
But you still let me go through this whole –

Dana
I’m learning how to be a general.

Richard
I don’t know what that means.

Dana
That’s OK. But you should come watch our show.

Richard (smiling)
Thank you.

(Dana steps back and is flustered by how close they were standing. There’s a moment where they lock eyes again)

Dana
Oh, and Richard? QVV? (shaking her head and smiling) I don’t like it.

Richard (gives a small laugh)
Have a good show, Dana

Dana (smiling)
Yeah. Good show.

(Dana walks out and Richard watches her leave and smiles)

Fade out

Episode 3.2: And the Nominees Are...

2006-10-15T20:47:00.000-07:00

Previously on Sports Night

Casey
Hey, look at me. We've won awards
Dan
Ah, ah, you've won awards
Casey
You've won awards.
Dan
I haven't won awards.
Casey
You've been nominated for awards.
Dan
It's not the same thing.
Casey
Sure it is.
Dan
That's easy for you to say, you've won awards.
--Dear Louise

Dana
Dan got nominated for Sports Personality of the Year. You and he both got nominated for Sports Anchor of the Year and everyone knows you’re a shoo-in since Steve Sisko took half the year off last year.
--Lamony and the Laker Girls

And the Nominees Are…
Episode 3.2

(Kim’s voice comes over the loudspeaker)
Five minutes to air. First team to the studio.

(Dan and Casey walk out of their office to the studio)

Dan
I’m not writing a speech. Are you writing a speech?

Casey
I am writing a speech and I think you should write one too.

Dan
I’m not writing one.

Casey
Is this the whole tempting fate thing?

Dan
Yes, Casey, this is the whole tempting fate thing (Casey rolls his eyes as Dan continues). You scoff, but fate is not kind to those who fly too close to the sun. Hubris, my friend. A little thing called hubris.

(They walk into the studio and Allison comes up to help them with makeup)

Casey
Allison, if I were you I would turn and run away now. Dan’s started in on Greek mythology.

Dan (smiling)
Icarus! (Looking straight into the camera) Jeremy! (Turning to Casey) Jeremy will be with me on this. (Looking back into the camera) Jeremy, tell Casey about Icarus.

Jeremy
What? All I heard was “Jeremy…Casey…us.” I think the mikes are broken.

Dana (staring at the monitors and clearly not focused on the control room)
What?

Kim
Does San Antonio have sound?

Dave
We’re getting there.

Jeremy
The mics are broken.

Dave
The mics in San Antonio?

Jeremy
No the mics here.

Natalie
Our mics are broken? (Speaking into her microphone) Hey, guys, wave if you can hear me!

(At the desk, Casey and Dan wave)

Natalie
The mics are fine. Preview animation.

Elliot
You’ve got it.

Natalie
That’s not right.

Jeremy
Not our mics. Their mics. In the studio. They’re cutting in and out.

Dana (staring at the monitor and speaking absently)
Mike Galveson? Yeah, he’s cutting in and out every time they’re on offense…he needs to…slow down…how hard is it to wait out the clock when…wait, what?

Jeremy
Actually, Dana, I’m pretty sure what’s on second.

Dana
Give me a break, Jeremy, I’ve been staring at the damn network feed for twenty-two minutes waiting for some indication as to whether we’re going on or holding for the end of this race.

Jeremy
Well, I certainly hope we’re holding because we don’t have any sound in the studio.

Dana (snapping out of her daze)
What? Oh! The mics are cutting in and out—I just got that—Chris! Will! What’s up with the mics? (She puts her headset on)

Will
We’re on it.

Dana (turning to Kim)
Kim, get me J.J. on the phone.

Natalie
This is getting ridiculous.

Dana
I know.

Natalie
They can’t check out already.

Dana
I know. But there’s not much I can do.

Dave

Three minutes VTR, two minutes live!

Kim (walks back in)
You’ve got J.J.

Dana
Natalie’s got the wheel. (She exits the control room)

Natalie
Hold tight, guys, we might be going up late.

(Back at the news desk Dan and Casey continue talking)

Dan
I’ve written speeches before.

Casey
I know.

Dan
And we know how that’s turned out.

Casey
Listen—

Dan
They call to make sure you’re going to be there. If you’re going to win these things, someone calls—

Casey
We’re presenting an award. They know you’ll be there.

Dan
I’m not writing a speech.

Casey
I think you should.

Dan
Why?

Casey
Danny—

Dan
Seriously, Case—give me one good reason—

Casey
Danny, you’re the prohibitive winner. Three different shows have predicted it’s going to be you. They know you’re going to be there because we’re introducing an award together and you deserve it. It’s not fate. It’s not hubris. It’s sure not Icarus. It’s fun—write a speech.

Dan (smiles slowly and holds Casey’s gaze)
You see, this is how hubris starts.

Casey
No this is how friendships end. Hey! (waving at the studio) Are we going on the air?

(Natalie out the control room window to see a pissed off Dana wave to get her attention then makes a cutting motion across her neck.)

Natalie (announcing into her mic and to the room)
We’re holding! Dave, take us down from ready one. We’re holding about 15 minutes for the end of the triathlon. (Everyone starts to leave) Hey! Fifteen minutes. Don’t go too far—fifteen minutes.

(Dana walks back in and sits down.)

Natalie
This really is getting ridiculous.

Dana
You’re telling me. We’re meeting tomorrow.

Natalie
You and Isaac and J.J. and…

Dana
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern or whatever the hell their names are this week. The rotating band of idiots they bring in there I swear he just wants to feel like he has a posse.

Natalie
You want me to come too? You could have a posse.

Dana (smiles at her appreciatively)
Thank you, but I may need you to take the first rundown.

Natalie
Whatever you need. (She stands up) I’m going to go find Jeremy.

Dana
Natalie. (Natalie turns back) It’s getting ridiculous.

Natalie (laughs ruefully)
Yeah.

(Back at the anchor desk, Dan and Casey remove their mics)

Dan
You know, this isn’t even the real problem.

Casey
No.

Dan
The real problem—

Casey
And here it comes.

Dan
Is that it’s been a week.

(Dan and Casey walk through the backstage area and out to the newsroom as the continue talking.)

Casey
It has.

Dan
One week.

Casey
Seven days.

Dan
You have no earthly clue what I’m talking about, do you?

Casey
No, but that’s not so much a problem for me as it is for you.

Dan
Rebecca.

Casey
Ah. (A beat) Just call her and get it over with.

Dan
It’s been a week. I can’t just call her after a week.

Casey
So what do you have to do?

Dan
Make a gesture. A grand gesture, Casey.

Casey
Invite her to come with you to this thing. You need a date anyway.

Dan
No I don’t. I’m perfectly capable of going to something like this alone.

Casey
What does your publicist say?

Dan
What does my publicist have to do with it?

Casey
She’s not gonna let you go alone.

Dan
First of all, my publicist is a guy. Secondly, she’s like, fourteen, she doesn’t get to tell me what to do.

Casey
Whatever you say.

Dan
Anyway, who are you bringing?

Casey
I’m going alone. (Off Dan’s look). But I’m allowed to go alone. You remember, I’m recently divorced. I’m expected to go alone.

Dan
You did that just to make me crazy didn’t you?

Casey
Got divorced? No Danny, I got married to make you crazy.

Dan
Well mission accomplished.

Casey
Just call her.

Dan
A grand gesture, Casey! That is what’s needed!

(They reach Dan and Casey’s office and Dan starts to walk in.)

Casey
What are you gonna do?

Dan
I’m probably just gonna call her.

Casey
Can I watch?

Dan
Go away from me now.

(Dan walks into their office and closes the door. Casey makes a sharp turn and heads over to where Natalie and Jeremy are talking at Jeremy’s desk.)

Casey (calls over his shoulder as the door slams)
Fifteen minutes!

Next Morning Cut to—Isaac’s Office

(Isaac is at his desk and J.J and two new executives, Desiree and Tom, are seated across from him. Dana is pacing as she speaks.)

Dana (yelling)
This has become a bad joke, J.J.! Last night I didn’t know until three minutes to air that we weren’t going on the air. And this is just the latest in the line of crap we have had to endure from you guys! You’ve pulled all of our advertising. Even stuff you’ve already paid for, which is just spiteful! We’re getting no support from you guys as far as staff or money! I talked to Sally Sasser about her two shows that didn’t go up, and you sold the West Coast Update timeslot twice! It’s just a matter of time before you start doing that to us!

J.J.
Dana, I’m going to ask you to watch your tone and your volume.

Dana
And I’m going to ask you to shove it up your ass, J.J. I’m trying to do a show!

J.J.
Isaac, how are we supposed to have a productive meeting if she insists on—

Isaac
I think she can hear you, J.J.

J.J.
I came here as a courtesy, Isaac. The fact of the matter is that Sports Night isn’t Continental Corp’s priority and you know that. While we finalize the papers with Quo Vadimus, we’re all in a bit of a holding pattern. (Dana makes a derisive noise and throws up her arms as J.J. continues) Quo Vadimus can’t take over yet, but you can’t ask Continental Corp. to divert resources to a show that won’t be our responsibility in a matter of—

Dana
Finalize the papers then! My god! You can’t say “we’re in a holding pattern” like you have, you know, no earthly clue why we’re in a holding pattern! You. are. the reason! You’re like an ex-boyfriend who gets mad when you start sleeping with someone else, you know that?

J.J.
Well, that was an incredibly sophisticated comparison, Dana.

Dana
You know, J.J., the extent to which you overestimate how much I give a damn about what you think of me is astounding.

J.J. (overlapping with the end of Dana’s sentence)
You know, I don’t need this from you.

Isaac
J.J., no one is asking you for anything outrageous. Keeping us updated as to when we’re going on the air shouldn’t divert any resources from Continental Corp that Luthur Sachs can’t afford to spare.

Dana
Speaking of which, where is Luther? Shouldn’t he be at this meeting?

J.J.
Luther wasn’t feeling well so he asked me—

Dana (rolling her eyes)
Right.

Desiree
Luther Sachs is an extremely busy man, Dana.

Dana (sarcastically)
Wow. No kidding? ‘Cause I have so much free time these days I was thinking about taking up crochet.

Isaac
Alright. Dana’s right. We have jobs to do, too and this hasn’t been productive. (He stands with his cane) J.J., Sports Night and Continental Corp. were a bad match. Our time together hasn’t been pleasant, but we’re nearing the homestretch. All I ask is we try to part ways with a little bit of class. I know that’s not too much to ask of Luther.

J.J.
Of course not, Isaac. (J.J., Desiree, and Tom stand up)

Isaac
Until the papers are finalized, Continental Corp. still owns this network and this show, and we expect professionalism from you all.

Tom
We really are trying to expedite the process.

Isaac
Please do.

(They file out and Dana glares at J.J. as they do. Once they’re gone she turns to Isaac.)

Dana
God!

Isaac
Yeah.

Dana
I just can’t believe they can be so—

Isaac
Dana?

Dana
Yeah?

Isaac

The SPAs are tonight. We’re going to do well. (He beams at her.) This is your night. We’ll worry about this tomorrow. Go be with your team.

Dana
This is really becoming a problem though, Isaac.

Isaac
I know. And it’ll still be a problem tomorrow. Stop worrying about it.

Dana
OK. But—

Isaac
Stop worrying about it. (Pauses and looks at her) Is everything alright?

Dana (chuckles)
Of course. I’m fine. (She smiles) I’ll stop worrying about it.

Isaac (eyes her)
OK.

Dana (shrugging)
OK.

(Dana walks out of Isaac’s office.)

Cut to—Dan and Casey’s Office

Dan
Who are you thanking first?

Casey
You.

Dan
Really?

Casey
Haven’t I thanked you first in the past?

Dan
No. In the past you thanked Lisa first.

Casey (shrugging)
Well then I thanked you last. Same thing.

Dan
How is that the same?

Casey
It is.

Dan
No I don’t think it is, Case, ‘cause, see, one’s first and one’s last.

Casey
It’s functionally the same. First or last—either way, they’re the important positions. (Stares at him as Dan looks back down and continues writing his speech) You know, when I encouraged you to write a speech I didn’t mean to give you the impression you should do so instead of, you know, our job.

Dan
We’re both off tonight for the awards.

Casey
Yeah, but we still need a script for the substitute anchors.

Dan
Who’d they get?

Casey
Peter and Annette.

Dan
Is Sally really running the room?

Casey
Yeah.

Dan
Damn. Was Natalie pissed?

Casey
Natalie’s coming.

Dan
Natalie’s coming?

Casey
Yeah she did the World Series segment, plus Jeremy’s up for the Villanova thing.

Dan (eyes the phone)
Do you think—

Casey
I think she probably hasn’t gotten your message yet.

Dan
How did you know I was going to ask about that?

Casey (sarcastically)
Because I can read your mind. Hey—how about “Thompson rushed for 32 yards proving that when you’re a Jet you’re a Jet all the way”?

Dan
That’s good.

Casey
Are we sharing a car tonight?

Dan
I feel like I’m going to prom.

Casey
I got stood up at my prom.

Dan
You did not.

Casey
I’m pretty sure I remember this better than you do.

Dan
I’ve seen your prom picture. (Smiling) You went with the Rockette.

Casey (smiling back)
Her name was Lynnae and she was not a Rockette. That’s just how everyone was wearing their hair. And that was my senior prom. I got stood up for junior prom.

Dan
Why’d she stand you up?

Casey
Eh. She got food poisoning. She had to go to the hospital.

Dan
That must have been really hard for you, Case.

Casey
That it was.

Dan
I’ll tell you what. I’ll thank you first tonight.

Casey
Well, that’s all I ask, Danny.

Cut to—Dana’s office

(Dana is sitting at her desk and Natalie is standing in the doorway)

Natalie (holds a dress against herself to show Dana)
What do you think?

Dana
Nice.

Natalie
Good. I want to look nice for tonight.

Dana (smiling)
For Jeremy.

Natalie
For Jeremy. Speaking of which, I think we might have a problem.

Dana
What?

Natalie
There was a misprint in the leaked list.

Dana (happily)
I know! Kim’s up for college sports segment! That’s seven nominations instead of six! This is a coup!

Natalie
Right, but that’s not the misprint I’m talking about.

Dana
What are you talking about?

Natalie
Jeremy’s nomination was misprinted in the leaked list. He was nominated for Villanova in the college sports category.

(Dana stands up and begins walking out to the newsroom with Natalie walking next to her.)

Dana
Wait…so Kim was nominated for…

Natalie
College Sports.

Dana (realizing)
Ooh. Intrigue!

Natalie
There’s a way to look at this that’s only good. We have such a talented group that we’re competing against each other for awards. It’s positive, it’s encouraging. That is a way to look at it.

Dana
But that’s not the way anyone’s going to be looking at it, is it?

Natalie
My guess would be no.

Dana
Fabulous

Natalie
Instead they’ve starting a pool and trying to get everyone to make bets.

Dana
Oh, rundown’s gonna be fun.

Natalie
Yes indeed. (Natalie goes off to the editing room and Dana walks toward Isaac’s office.)

Cut to—Dan and Casey’s office
(Dan is writing and begins counting words on his page.)

Dan
These things don’t need to be long, right?

Casey (looking over Dan’s shoulder)
They need to be longer than that. How is that all you’ve written so far?

Dan
I genuinely believe that the best speeches are the shortest, Casey.

Casey
I genuinely believe that you’re distracted by the phone not ringing.

Dan
The best speeches are the shortest. “I have a dream,” for example.

Casey
You realize that wasn’t the entire speech, right? There were other words in it?

Dan
The Gettysburg Address. How long was the Gettysburg Address?

(Jeremy walks into Dan and Casey’s office and Dan looks up)

Dan
Jeremy, how many words were in the Gettysburg Address?

Jeremy (a beat)
Two hundred sixty-six.

Casey (looks up)
That’s random.

Jeremy
Two sixty-six? Yeah, I guess it could have been two sixty-five.

Casey
No. I mean it’s random that you know that. How do you know that?

Jeremy
I read it once.

Casey
You read that the Gettysburg Address was two hundred sixty-six words?

Jeremy
No. I read the Gettysburg Address.

Dan (shaking his head)
You’re different than most of the people we spend time with.

Jeremy

The two of you are most of the people you spend time with.

Dan (looking at Casey)
He’s got us there.

Casey
True.

Jeremy
Anyway, Natalie wanted me to tell you rundown’s in five minutes.

Casey
Thanks. (Jeremy leaves and Dan continues staring at the phone) What did you say when you called?

Dan
Just to call me back.

Casey
You didn’t invite her to the thing.

Dan (pauses)
Nah. I just told her to call me back.

Casey (confidently)
She will.

Dan
How do you know?

Casey
I know things. Women, being one of those things.

Dan
OK, that doesn’t help me Case, because you’ve had, like 3 dates in your life and you’re going alone to this thing tonight because the last one divorced you.

Casey
True, but at least all three of my dates called me back.

Dan
Let’s go to rundown.

Cut to—Conference Room
(Everyone is sitting around the conference table and Sally is there too.)

Dan
We cut the Minute Men stuff so you can have, like, a buck fifty back.

Dana
You were planning on spending that much time on the Minute Men?

Casey
We’re artists, Dana. You can’t constrain artists.

Dana
See, now, I’m pretty sure I get paid to do just that. Sally, you’re going to want to tease Nascar and Phil Jackson, since the Rangers won’t be done yet.

Sally
Right.

Natalie
And don’t forget the change-up in the 30s.

Sally
Right.

Dana
Just stick completely to the script and you should be fine.

Sally (with mock appreciation)
Wow. Your confidence in me is inspiring, Dana

(The room becomes uncomfortably quiet. Dana clears her throat.)

Dana
Sally, I have all the confidence in the world in you. I’m just nervous because neither Natalie nor myself will be here, but I couldn’t ask for a better substitute than you. Okay. We’re leaving at 5:30, so Sally’s running the last two rundowns. What else?

Kim
Dana, I just wanted to remind everyone to place your bets on the SPAs tonight. We’ve expanded the pool so you can now bet on all the awards for tonight, not just mine.

Jeremy
You mean mine.

Dana
Oh please don’t you two start.

Kim
Whatever. (She pulls out a sheet and passes it around)

Dana (taking the sheet)
You know, you people are—wait, what!? This has to be wrong. Do you realize that some of you are voting against Sports Night for the categories we’re up for? Sports Show of the Year and Best Super Bowl Coverage—you should not be voting against us in those categories!

Jeremy
Well, Dana, you have to play the odds with these things.

Dana
Well, thank you, so much for that, but I happen to believe in a little thing called loyalty. I’ve got 100 bucks on us for both categories.

Natalie
But people are already betting against so if we lose you’re going to owe—

Dana
Loyalty.

Natalie
Whatever you say.

Dana
Final thing. Please be warned, we’re having some issues with CSC right now.

Casey (looking at his watch)
Oh, wow. Is it last year already?

Dana
I know. But until the papers are finalized they’re still our pocketbook, so acceptance speeches must be gracious. I mean it! Do not go up there and piss anybody off.

Dan
Why are you looking at me?

Dana
Because Isaac wasn’t nominated for anything. (Isaac chuckles.) Sally, do you have anything?

Sally
Good luck tonight, to all of you. (Everyone smiles and says thanks as they stand up and file out.)
Dana (to no one in particular)
Alright. Let’s go.

Cut to—Dana’s Office

Natalie
So I have a problem.

Dana
God that woman drives me crazy! Sally Sasser drives me absolutely crazy. (Looks at Natalie) What’s your problem?

Natalie
Well I have to make my predictions for tonight for the pool.

Dana
Do not bet against Sports Night, I need you to be with me on this.

Natalie
I am with you.

Dana (looking at Natalie suspiciously and then her eyes get wide as she realizes)
Natalie, you can’t!

Natalie
I just honestly believe Kim has the better shot. I would love for Jeremy to win this award! I’m not rooting against him, I’m just betting against him.

Dana
Wow, it’s almost hard to believe you don’t want to make that argument to him.

Natalie
I was considering it

Dana
Well stop considering it.

Natalie
You think no? (Dana givers her a look.)

Natalie
So my hands are tied?

Dana
It’s a kidnapping, Natalie. (She stares out the window.) What do you think the odds are that Sally’s going to screw something up tonight? I’d like to place a bet on that.

Natalie
She’ll be fine.

Dana
(In a mocking voice) “Your confidence in me is astounding.” God she’s just so—

Natalie
You need to give her a break.

Dana (rolling her eyes)
Why? Because she’s taking the show tonight?

Natalie
Well. Yeah, actually, but that’s not really why.

Dana
Then why?

Natalie
Because they’ve sold her timeslot twice and Quo Vadamus already thinks West Coast Update is a money drain. She’s fighting a battle she’s not going to win while she’s trying to hold her show together with both hands and you know what that’s like.

Dana
You know, you’re really annoying when you’re right.

Natalie
It’s weird isn’t it? (She turns and starts to walk out.) So be nice!

Dana (calling after her)
Oh go bet against your boyfriend!

Cut to—Concert Hall
(Isaac, Esther, Dan, Casey, Dana, Natalie, Jeremy, and Kim are seated around a table.)

Dana
See the problem is that we can’t hurry them along. Because of some ridiculous technicality, CSC can actually run out the contract before Quo Vadimus can take over. There’s like a year left, so…they’re dragging their feet. (She gives a small smile and shrugs) And there’s really nothing we can do about it.

Jeremy
So we’re going to be with CSC for another year?

Dana
Well—

Isaac
No. They have the option to run out the contract. They’re not going to do it. We should be out of the holding pattern in a couple of weeks, so don’t worry about it.

Kim
Last chance to make final bets! I just got off the phone with Dave—he wants five on Russ Stogey for NFL Highlights.

Dan
Yeah, Stogey’s got a lock on that.

Casey (looking at Dan)
You look nervous.

Dan
I’m not nervous.

Casey
Well you look nervous.

Jeremy (looking at the SPA pool sheet)
Natalie, what is this?

Dana
Uh-oh

Jeremy
Wait did you—You bet against me?

Kim (smiling)
Tonight’s gonna be fun.

Natalie
I didn’t bet against you, honey, it’s that I—Well, it’s just that…yes. That’s exactly what I did.

Jeremy
Nice show of support.

Natalie
Well, it kind of is, right? Because if you lose I still win $50 I can take you out for a nice dinner to cheer you up.

Jeremy
Give me that sheet. (Takes it and erases something). There, now if your segment on the World Series loses, I can take you out for dinner.

Dana (shaking her head)
Tonight’s gonna be fun.

Natalie
OK, but see now, yours is just spiteful because you know my segment is going to win that one.

Jeremy
Strangely enough, I still take pleasure in it.

Isaac (leaning over to Dan)
Casey wants me to make sure you stay calm tonight. Are you calm?

Dan
Not you too.

Casey
Well, you look nervous.

Dan
I do not.

Isaac
You look—

Dan (laughing)
Stop telling me how I look.

Casey
Is this about Rebecca? (To Isaac) I told him he should have brought a date.

(Isaac laughs and Dan glares at him.)

Esther
Leave the poor boy alone.

Isaac (laughing)
He looks nervous!

Dan
You, on the other hand, look unbelievable tonight, Esther.

Esther

Thank you, Danny.

Dan
Are you here with anyone? It comes to my attention that I need a date.

Isaac (points at Dan)
Watch it.

Casey
Do you have your speech?

Dan (tapping his breast pocket)
Yes.

Casey
Do you need a drink?

Dan
Casey—

Casey
I’m just looking out for you, Danny.

Dan
I’m perfectly fine. I’m a rock. I haven’t gotten myself all worked up about tonight so nothing can shake me.

(Out of the corner of his eye he spots Rebecca standing with Steve Sisquo and talking to a group of people. Dan freezes and Casey follows his gaze and sees Rebecca.)

Casey
You look nervous, Danny.

Dan
I’ve been better.

Casey
Let’s get a drink.

(Casey and Dan stand up and walk to the bar. A man walks out on stage and begins speaking.)

Announcer
Good evening and welcome to the 2000 Sports Program Awards!

Cut to—the bar

(Casey and Dan get drinks and stand next to the bar while the program continues on stage. Dan is facing the bar with his back to the room and Casey is facing the room and watching Rebecca for Dan.)

Casey
What is she doing here? Is she here with Steve Sisquo?

Dan
I should go talk to her. Meet me back at the table.

Casey
No, I’m your wingman.

Dan
That can’t be good for me. Meet me back at the table.

Casey
It might be too late for that.

Dan
Why?

Casey
Because she’s coming over here now.

Rebecca (walking over to them)
Hi Dan. Hi Casey.

Casey
Hi Rebecca.

(Dan hands his glass to Casey and nods toward the table. Casey waves to Rebecca as he walks back to the table and sits back down.)

Dan
Hi.

Rebecca (smiling)
Hi.

Dan
I’m glad you’re here.

Rebecca (still smiling)
I’m glad you’re here too. I was hoping you’d show. I heard through the grapevine you were up for an award.

Dan (smiling)
Gotta love that grapevine.

Cut to—the table

Casey
Rebecca is here and I think she’s with Steve Sisquo.

Natalie
Oh you’re kidding me. (Natalie strains to try to get a better look.)

Dana (watching the stage)
OK—shh! This is us. This is Super Bowl coverage. (She reaches over and squeezes Isaac’s hand)

Announcer
And the winner is…CSC’s Sports Night!

(Everyone at the table stands up and cheers. They hug each other and Dana kisses Isaac on the cheek as she makes her way up to the stage. Casey reaches out for her and as they embrace she whispers “Tonight’s gonna be fun.”)

(As Dana goes on stage to give a speech, Dan and Rebecca make their way over to the table.)

Dan (smiling and gesturing to Dana onstage)
Not bad.

Casey
Not bad at all.

(Dan grabs another chair from a nearby table and gives Rebecca the one he was sitting in. Dan is now sitting in between Rebecca and Casey. As he sits Casey gives him a curious look, but he just shakes his head.)

Rebecca
Hey. Congratulations you guys!

Natalie
Thanks Rebecaa. We’re glad you decided to join us.

Rebecca (smiling)
Well, of course. It’s a big night.

Dana (walking back to the table holding the award and beaming)
Ha! Pay up, oh ye of little faith! (A beat) Rebecca. (She glances curiously at Dan) You’re with us? That’s great!

Rebecca
Of course I am. (Looks at Dan and lowers her voice) Why is everyone so surprised that I’m here?

Dan
They tend to show surprise whenever women seem to take an interest in me.

Rebecca
Well, I guess I understand that. (smiling) So when’s your big award?

Dan
It’s really not that big. Casey’s is big…mine is just…an award.

Rebecca
How do you know which ones are big and which ones aren’t?

Dan
The big ones are Sports Show of the Year, Sports Anchor of the Year…anything that has a corollary at the ESPIEs, basically.

Rebecca
But you’re up for Sports Anchor of the Year.

Dan
Yeah, but I’m not going to win that one.

Rebecca
Steve’s up for that one too.

Dan
Yeah, well, he’s really not going to win that one. Casey’s going to.

Rebecca
If you know all of this, why do you guys even bother coming to these things?

Dan (raises his glass)
Open bar.

Rebecca
Of course.

Dana
The thing is, I’m not so sure I want us doing too well tonight.

Kim
Did you want to change your bet?

Dana
No. I mean—(She lowers her voice) I don’t know if the show doing well is going to make CSC want to hang on longer.

Isaac
Oh would you please?

Dana (still whispering)
I’m serious. I honestly think they might be having second thoughs.

Natalie (whispering)
And you think they’re dragging their feet because they don’t actually want to sell?

Jeremy (whispering)
Why are we whispering?

Isaac
Because you’re all crazy! CSC is not having second thoughts. Luther Sachs does not want to keep us on. He barely wanted to keep us when he had us. Can everyone please just stop worrying about this?

Casey (reading a card and nudging Dan)
We have to check in backstage in 15 minutes. We’re up after this next segment.

Dan (to Rebecca)
Casey and I are presenting in a few minutes.

Rebecca (laughing and not expecting an answer)
And who’s winning that award?

Everyone
Paul Minnow.

Rebecca (looking in disbelief)
So, the element of surprise is completely lost on you all, isn’t it?

Dan
Not so much lost on us as shunned.

Rebecca
OK, maybe I should be drinking more.

Natalie
Well, that’s usually a pretty safe bet in this crowd.

Kim
Rebecca, do you want to join our pool? (She hands Rebecca the sheet of paper with everyone’s bets) We’re all placing bets on the awards.

Rebecca
How are you all betting on anything if everyone knows who’s going to win everything?

Isaac
We only know some of them. The awards that go to shows and segments are usually kept a little more secret than the individual ones.

Rebecca (looking at the sheet)
Wait, you guys this can’t be right. Some of you are betting against Sports Night for your awards.

Dana (throws up her hands)
Thank you!

Rebecca
And, Natalie, did you mean to bet against Jeremy?

Jeremy (throws up his hands)
Thank you!

Natalie
Um, honey, you lost a little moral high ground when you changed your bet so that you were betting against me too.

Rebecca
So you guys realize that you’re betting real money right? Isn’t there a cheaper way to fight with each other?

Jeremy
Well, I’m sure there is, but the concept of wise investment strategies?

Rebecca
Also lost on you?

Jeremy (smiling)
More like shunned.

Rebecca (standing up)
And I’m going to the bar.

(Everyone watches her leave then turns to Dan.)

Natalie
So what happened!? I thought she was here with Steve Sisquo!

Dan (whispering)
Let’s talk about it later

Dana
She’s going to be gone for like, two minutes, Danny, this would pretty much be our window.

Dan
I don’t want to get into it. Just don’t bring it up with her.

Rebecca (coming back)
Hey. Do you guys need to go backstage?

Dan
We do indeed. (Casey and Dan stand up and start to leave, but Dan turns back.) I’m glad you’re here.

Rebecca
Me too. Now get going. Paul Minnow is waiting to be surprised with an award he knows he’s winning.

(Casey and Dan start walking)

Casey (watching Dan)
She really likes you, huh?

Dan
It’s almost hard to believe.

Casey (smiling)
Yeah, almost.

(They walk toward the backstage area and continue talking.)

Dan
What’s up with Dana?

Casey

I do not know.

Dan
She seems really stressed about CSC and everything.

Casey
Well don’t you start thinking about that. You need to stay focused.

Dan
I’m really not making a big deal, Casey

Casey
Because of the Greeks.

Dan
Because of the Greeks.

Casey
Whatever you say.

Dan
But seriously, I think something’s up with Dana.

Casey
I’ll get into it when we get back to the table. You just keep your head in the game.

(They walk backstage)

Cut to—the table
(Dan and Casey have just presented their award together and the next category is college sports. The announcer lists the nominees as everyone continues to talk.)

Jeremy
This is it.

Natalie
Good luck, honey.

Kim (smiling at Jeremy)
Thank you, Natalie.

Natalie (rolling her eyes)
I was talking to Jeremy.

Jeremy
I’m not speaking to you.

Natalie
Wait, to me or to Kim?

Jeremy
To either of you really.

Kim
Then who are you talking to now?

(Jeremy begins to answer when he’s interrupted by the announcer)

Announcer
Jeremy Goodwin!

(The room applauds and Natalie stands up and cheers loudly as she reaches in her purse and puts a $50 bill on the table.)

Jeremy (turning to Natalie)
You just happened to have a $50 bill in your purse?

Natalie (grinning)
I really was hoping I’d need it.

Jeremy
You’re impossible

Natalie
And you’re amazing. (He kisses her.)
Jeremy
And I didn’t really change my bet. Smart money’s always been on you.

Natalie

So you’re not going to give me a hard time about this?

Jeremy

Oh, no, I definitely am.

(Natalie stares after Jeremy as he walks toward the stage)

(Dan and Casey return to the table in time to shake hands with Jeremy as he goes onstage to receive his award.)

Dan (squeezes Kim’s shoulders briefly and kisses her head before sitting back down)
How are we doing?

Kim
I lost, but I’m still up overall, so I’m doing OK.

Dana
I’m grabbing a drink.

Casey
I’ll go with you.

(They walk over to the bar, but don’t order anything yet.)

Casey
What’s going on with you?

Dana (shrugs)
Nothing.

Casey
Really?

Dana
Really.

Casey
Really?

Dana
Honest to god, Casey is this gonna go on much longer?

Casey
The whole thing with CSC. You’re nervous they don’t want to sign, you think they’re dragging their feet on purpose…it almost seems like you want there to be some problem with this.

Dana
Of course I don’t want there to be a problem! I’m just pretty sure there is one and I’m just looking out for the show.

Casey
So you’d be fine if there was no problem?

Dana
Fine? I’d be thrilled!

Casey (looks at her)
Really?

Dana
Casey!

Casey
Good. Because my publicist called backstage. CSC is releasing a statement in the morning. They finalized the papers. We’re officially sold.

Dana (she is visibly shocked and doesn’t look happy)
We are?

Casey
Yeah.

Dana (quietly)
Really?

Casey (smiling)
Yeah.

Dana (nodding)
Well, OK, then. Let’s see what happens next.

(As she says that Casey realizes Dan’s category is up next and walks back to the table. Dana turns to order a glass of wine)

Dana (quietly and to herself)
Let’s see what happens next.

(Casey gets back to the table and Dana is a few steps behind him)

Casey (to Dan)
This is it. This is you.

(The table gets quiet and Rebecca holds Dan’s hand)

Announcer
The next award tonight is for Sports Television Personality of the Year. And the nominees are: Tom Mooring of Fox Sports. Dan Rydell of Sports Night. Ted Mueson of Fox Sports. And Terry Weeler of Sports Center. And the award goes to…Terry Weeler of Sports Center.

(Dan recovers first and claps politely. The rest of the table applauds quietly, but everyone is visibly stunned. Dan finishes his drink as Terry Weeler gives an acceptance speech. Rebecca rubs Dan’s arm affectionately.)

Casey
Danny—

Dan
It’s fine.

Dana
I can’t believe that many shows were wrong. Everyone was sure it was going to be you.

Dan (smiling)
Really. It’s fine. (He stands up.) Anyone want another drink? Isaac?

Isaac
Scotch.

Dan
You got it.

(Dan stands up and goes to the bar. Rebecca starts to stand, but Casey catches her arm and she sits. He follows Dan to the bar.)

Casey
I’m sorry.

(Dan takes a shot from the bartender and hands it to Casey and orders another one. He also gets two beers. They take the shot together and sip their beers.)

Dan
It really is fine. You didn’t do anything.

Casey
I made you write a speech. I made a big deal. You wanted to keep it low key and I got you excited—

Dan
I invited her. (Casey looks at him) Rebecca. I invited her tonight.

Casey
When?

Dan
She called back. I-I invited her.

Casey
And you made her meet you here?

Dan (smiling)
She had to meet me here anyway. It just made it easier…

Casey
To not tell anyone?

Dan (he smiles and shrugs)
I was excited. I didn’t want everyone to know how much but…(he smiles and nods) I was excited.

Casey
This sucks.

Dan
It really is fine.

Casey
Maybe for you. I lost $100 on that.

Dan (smiling)
You see? Hubris.

Casey
I’ve seriously had it up to here with the Greeks.

Dan
Let’s go back. (He orders a scotch from the bartender.)

Casey
Let’s go home. Let’s get out of here.

Dan
There’s like, 30 minutes left.

Casey
Yeah, but still. Come on.

Dan
They haven’t announced your award yet.

Casey
I don’t care about that.

Dan
I know. (A beat) But I do.

Casey (raises his beer to Dan)
Thanks.

Dan
Well, not so much for you as I have money riding on it.

Casey (smiles at Dan)
Oh, well, in that case.

(They walk back to the table. Dan hands Isaac his drink and Rebecca takes his hand again. Dana is walking back from the stage holding the award for Sports Show of the Year.)

(Casey whistles loudly and Dan begins clapping)

Dan
Oh my god! (He grabs Dana and kisses her cheek. Dana looks distracted, but smiles and looks excited when Dan grabs her. Casey watches Dana’s face, but says nothing.)

Casey
So how much longer is this thing?

Natalie
There’s the Howard Cosell/Mohammad Ali lifetime thing and then Anchor of the Year. That’s it.

Jeremy
I thought they filmed the lifetime thing earlier.

Natalie
I thought I saw Cosell’s family here. I’m pretty sure it’s live. But maybe I’m wrong. (She looks around)

Jeremy (smiling)
Wouldn’t be the first time tonight.

Natalie
Not letting this go anytime soon, are you honey?

Jeremy
Not a chance.

Kim (checking the pool sheet)
Well, Dana was the big winner tonight.

Dana
What did I tell you? Loyalty.

Isaac
I just got off the phone with Elliot—he said the show went very well.

Natalie (to Dana)
I told you she’d be fine.

Dana
Yeah, I’ll be the judge of that.

Casey
When are you going to let her off the hook?

Dana
You lack a bit of credibility when it comes to this, Casey.

Casey
Just because I slept with her? That doesn’t have to affect my abilities to assess her professional skills—look at Natalie and Jeremy.

Natalie (nudging Casey)
Oh I was hoping we’d keep bringing that up.

Rebecca
You guys really do just have your own fun, don’t you?

Dan (grinning at the table)
We really do.

Kim
OK, so we’re pretty much out of categories…I’ve got twenty that says there are more white limos outside than black ones. Who’s in?

Dana
You seriously need help.

Casey
Oh and you’re one to talk. First year in college she actually tried to bet on—

Dana
And I thought we agreed we were going to stop telling this story.

Natalie
Well, I’m already down. I’ll pay twenty-five bucks to hear the story.

Kim
Make it fifty!

(Everyone at the table begins laughing, raising the bet, and chiding Dana, until Isaac raises his voice to get everyone’s attention.)

Isaac (grinning proudly)
Danny! (Everyone turns to look at Isaac) I think that young man would like you to go up there and stand next to him.

(Everyone looks up and realizes all at once the commercial break is over and the Mohammad Ali/Howard Cosell segment had been filmed earlier. The show is almost over and they had talked through Sports Anchor of the Year being named. The rest of the room is applauding and the cameras are on Dan.)

(Casey looks surprised and then begins clapping proudly and genuinely. Casey grins and stands up and so does everyone else at their table.)

(Rebecca kisses Dan’s cheek and Casey grabs him and hugs him. They shake hands grinning at each other happily for a moment. )

Casey (leans forward and says into Dan’s ear)
You can thank Rebecca first if you want.

Dan (without hesitating)
Not a chance.

(Dan walks on stage as Sports Night’s table continues clapping loudly and cheering. As he passes Isaac they hit fists slyly. Dan walks up to the microphone.)

Dan
You’re all in luck—the night is over and I’m a firm believer that the best speeches are the shortest!

(Everyone laughs and Dan begins his thank-yous)

(Fade out)

Episode Guide

2006-06-18T13:46:00.000-07:00

1. Lamony and the Laker Girls
The gang is forced to deal with the aftermath of confessions and impulse moves when the show is saved.

2. And the Nominees Are…
Excitement, a little friendly competition, and confusion are all in the air at the SPAs when Kim and Jeremy are up against each other for an award, and Rebecca shows up on Steve Sisko’s arm.

3. General Benjamin Bradley
Casey deals with Charlie's first crush, prompting him to evaluate his own romantic situation. With Rebecca back in his life, Dan is cautiously optimistic, certain that he may be jinxed at any moment. Meanwhile, the papers are finalized, the sale of CSC to Quo Vadumus is official, and the crew braces itself for changes under the new regime.

Episode 3.1: Lamony and the Laker Girls

2006-06-18T13:22:00.000-07:00

Casey
Tune in tomorrow night when we’ll have highlights from the Wimbledon match that pitted sister against sister. And we’ll have an update on the increasingly vicious feud that is the Lakers locker room.

Dan
I’m Dan Rydell for Casey McCall and all of us over here at CSC. You’ve been watching Sports Night. Good night.

Casey
Good night.

Dave
Music. Go. Animation. Go. We’re out! (He pronounces the last word emphatically and the crew immediately begins high fiving each other and cheering)

(At the anchor desk, Dan and Casey are grinning and give each other five)

Casey
We’ve been saved.

Dan
We have.

Casey
No need to move to LA. No LA philharmonic. No Esa-Pekka Salonen of Hellsinki Finland.

Dan
No sir.

Casey (looking at Dan a little curiously; suspiciously. He wants to ask more than he’s letting on).
No Laker Girls.

Dan (deadpanning disappointment)
I fought on the wrong side.

(Casey continues taking his mike off and gathering papers, but he does not smile)

Cut to—Issac’s Office
Issac is sitting at his desk. He is reading and smiling when Dana walks in.

Dana
You should have told me Isaac.

Isaac
Good evening, Dana. Please. Come in.

Dana
This isn’t a joke. You knew about Calvin Tregar.

Isaac
I knew about the possibility of Calvin Tregar.

Dana
A possibility you should have let me in on.

Isaac
Dana…

Dana
Isaac. I’m your Skipper; I'm your first mate. I have to know what’s going on!

Isaac
You can't be my skipper and my first mate, Dana

Dana
Skipper means first mate.

Isaac
Skipper means captain.

Dana
(A beat) Skipper means captain?

Isaac
Skipper means captain.

Dana
Are you sure?

Isaac (smiling)
Pretty sure.

Dana (shaking her head)
I should have been in the loop.

Isaac
When you’re in the loop, Dana, the loop has a tendency to expand. I didn’t want to get yours or anyone else’s hopes up until we knew something for sure.

Dana
I need to be kept in the loop.

Isaac
You will be.

Dana
Promise?
(Off Isaac’s look)
I mean it, Isaac. Promise me I’m back in the loop. Promise me the show, our show, will not take any more abrupt turns without me knowing everything that you kn—

Isaac
Dana?

Dana
Yes?

Isaac
I’m happy too.

(Dana takes a moment to process and gives a small smile.)

Dana
I need to be in the loop.

Isaac
You will be.

(Dana heads toward the door and then she impulsively runs back and hugs Isaac and kisses his cheek.)

Dana (whispering)
I was scared.

Isaac
(Smiling broadly) You hid it well. I’ll see you tomorrow.

Dana (Strutting)
Yes you will.

Cut to the control room where only Natalie and Jeremy are left

Jeremy
Natalie…

Natalie
That’s my name.

Jeremy
I know.

Natalie
What’s up?

Jeremy
You know what’s up. (whispering) We should talk about—

Casey (walking in)
Hey! Anthony’s?

Natalie (she moves away from Jeremy)
Anthony’s!

Dan
Jeremy. I need to talk to you.

Jeremy
I need to talk to Natalie.

Dan
But mine is quick and must be done before we leave the office.

Jeremy (watching Natalie as she nods at him and she and Casey walk into the newsroom)
Fine. What’s up?

Dan
Well. As you know, Sports Night has been saved. We will no longer be dispersing, going our own separate ways, and much of what has transpired in the last few weeks now seems unnecessary in this light of a new day. We have been saved, Jeremy, and with this—

Jeremy
So you were using the less common, more ironic definition of “quick?”

Dan
Can I have your copy of The Godfather back? Mine still skips.

Jeremy
I’ll bring it in tomorrow. Though, you know, you could just buy a new copy of the movie instead of permanently borrowing mine.

Dan
This is cheaper.

Jeremy (rolling his eyes)
Anthony’s.

Dan (walking out of the control room to his office)
Anthony’s!

Cut to Dan and Casey’s office where Casey is staring at his desk and drinking a beer.

(Dan walks in and grabs a beer from the fridge.)

Casey
So I should move.

Dan
Huh?

Casey
I should move.

Dan
No. I heard you. But I don’t see the sudden need for you to move. Especially since you moving will involve me helping.

Casey
I have my own office. I should use it. Now that it looks like we’re gonna be on the air for awhile longer we should reassess the decisions we made when we thought we’d only be on the air for…well, not awhile longer. In any event, I should move.

Dan
Are you breaking up with me?

Casey
If you want me to stay I’ll stay.

Dan
For the kids, Case. You should stay for the kids.

Casey
I’m just saying we could have our own offices.

Dan (closing the door)
What’s up, Casey?

Casey
Nothing’s up.

Dan
Something’s up.

Casey
Things are up but nothing’s up with me.

Dan
Ah-ha!

Casey
What ‘ah-ha’?

Dan
You admit nothing’s up with you. So you’re down?

Casey
Logic doesn’t play one bit of a role in your life does it?

Dan
Not as such.

Casey
Must be nice.

Dan
It’s quietly liberating. (Getting serious). Seriously, Casey, what’s wrong?

Casey (he exhales and kind of smiles in spite of himself)
Nothing. It’s just. You had gotten kind of excited about LA hadn’t you?

Dan (shrugging and taking a swig of his beer)
It was a good alternative to this.

Casey
Are you disappointed?

Dan
What?

Casey
Disappointed. No LA weather. No Laker Girls…No breaking out on your own…

Dan
Are you writing a musical?

Casey
You know what I mean. After everything last month with the list and now your publicist…was this your chance to start fresh?

Dan
Casey. I love this show. I want to do this show. Our show. Really.

Casey (studying Dan’s face for a moment)
Good.

Dan (smirking)
Did we just have a little thing here?

Casey
Yeah, I guess we did.

Dan
And you’re the one who freaked out. You know, you’re kind of a woman, Casey.

Casey (scoffing)
My freak out was nowhere near as big as you getting pissed because I forgot the date we first went on the air.

Dan
Maybe not, but I did a better job diffusing the situation. Which is why you are buying my drinks tonight.

Casey (they clink their beers together in a toast)
Fair enough.

Cut to Anthony’s where the entire gang is sitting at a table with several empty glasses around. They look happy and tipsy.

Dana
Jeremy, teach me the quadratic equation.

Jeremy
Well, Dana's drunk.

Dana
I'm not drunk! I happen to have an unquenchable thirst for knowledge and I'll have you know that I used to be very good at math.

Jeremy
Really?

Dana
Yes.

Jeremy (laughing)
And that was…when?

Dana
Well, I know enough math to be able add your salary back to the show’s budget.

Jeremy
Enough said. (Standing up) This round’s on me.

Dan
Nope. They’re all on Casey.

Dana
Thirst is a weird word.

Dan (laughing)
Dana you are so drunk!

Dana
I am not!

Jeremy
Everyone having the same?

Natalie
No. I want a Pina Colada.

Jeremy
You’ve been drinking Pina Coladas.

Natalie (looking at her empty glasses)
Then whose rum and Coke did I just finish

Chris (looking up)
Oh. That was mine. But it wasn’t a rum and Coke. It was Scotch.

Natalie
If I can’t tell the difference maybe I should sit this round out.

(Everyone groans and pushes her playfully)

Dana
No! It’s a celebration, Natalie! Get her another margarita!

Jeremy
Pina Colada.

Dana
Whatever!

Casey
Man, are you drunk

Dana (grinning)
I'm not drunk. I'm happy.

(Jeremy leaves and Natalie turns toward Dana)

Natalie
I slept with Jeremy.

Dana
Well, I figured. You guys dated for awhile.

Natalie
No. I slept with Jeremy today…In Issac’s office.

Dana
WHAT!?

Natalie
Shhh!

Dana (quieter)
WHAT?

Natalie
It was impulsive. (Smiling) It was nice.

Dana
And now?

Natalie
Now it’s weird…now it’s lamony.

Dana
What is lamony?

Dan (overhearing this last part breaks in)
Lamony is a disease.

Casey
No it isn’t. Lamony is a type of, sort of, French dessert.

Natalie
You guys are idiots. Lamony isn’t even a real word. It’s a word I made up when I was in junior high school. See, I always had this fear that the world would end. But it wouldn’t just end, somehow we’d all know it in advance. Like, there would be one day left on earth and everyone in the world would know it and then—boom.

Casey
My god, did you grow up Catholic. (Dana chuckles)

Natalie
Yes I did. Anyway, (Jeremy walks up with the drinks) so I thought we’d all get a day where we knew the world was ending and then we would get to go around and make amends for all the things we did. Tell people we really do love them.

Casey
Confess our sins. Be forgiven.

Natalie
Blah, blah, blah. But I always wondered, what if we were wrong? What if we thought the end was the next day and the world actually continued. Then we’d have to deal with each other after we made all of these confessions and shared our real feelings. I needed a word for what that would feel like. So I made up lamony.

Jeremy
You’re an interesting woman.

Natalie [smiling]
You don’t know the half of it.

Dan
So our world almost ended…

Casey
Near death experience…

Jeremy
So we should prepare ourselves for lamony?

Natalie
Yep. You’ll see. We’ll have weird conversations, weird interactions, attempts to save face…

Dana
Well, I’m sold. (She takes a huge sip of her margarita) I lamonied with Issac tonight after the show.

Natalie
You’re using the word wrong.

Dana
You mean the fake word?

Natalie
Yes.

Dana
I'm using it wrong?

Natalie
Yes.

Dana (laughing)
Well thank you for that.

Kim
So how was your lamony with Issac?

Dana
Good. I saved face (looks at Natalie for approval) for seeming freaked out about the show almost ending.

Kim
Good!

Natalie
Guys you don’t lamony with someone.

Dan
(Turning to Casey) Hey, remember when you got all lamony on me tonight?

Casey (nodding)
Yes I do.

Natalie
You guys are impossible.

(Casey and Dan clink their drinks together in a toast)
Casey and Dan (in unison)
Lamony.

(Natalie rolls her eyes.)

Dana (she looks from Jeremy to Natalie and then at the group)
Guys we need more drinks.

Dan (looking at his nearly full drink and laughing)
Dana, we just got—

Dana (slightly whispering)
Natalie and Jeremy need a lamony.

Natalie
Smooth, Dana.

Dana (shrugging)
Well. I’m drunk.

(The group heads over to the bar and Jeremy scoots in closer to Natalie)

Natalie
Jeremy, I don’t know if this is the best timing for this conversation. I’m drunk.

Jeremy
I’m drunk, too.

Natalie
Yes, but I don’t think we have the same fears when we’re drunk. I’m afraid I’ll say something I’ll regret. You’re afraid you’ll trip.

Jeremy (looking at her quizzically)
Are you mad at me?

Natalie
No. But…(she rolls her eyes) Of course I am! I had to throw myself at you Jeremy! And you just looked at me like…

Jeremy
I distinctly remember doing more than just looking.

Natalie
Well, sure, eventually! Once we started…you know, you got into the spirit. But...Jeremy, I told you I still loved you and you just—You do this thing, Jeremy, where you are so—God!

Jeremy
I’m so what?

Natalie
Suffice to say I don’t think you should be afraid of getting drunk and saying something you’ll regret.

Jeremy
Natalie—

Natalie
I’m going to the bar, Jeremy.

(Jeremy looks after Natalie as she goes and joins her friends and ushers them back to the table. Natalie sits on the other side of Dana at the far end of the table away from Jeremy.)

Casey (noticing the tension mutters out of earshot of Natalie)
Nobody ever said lamony was easy.

The next morning—Casey and Dan’s office
(Casey is reading a memo and leaning against the big desk. Dana walks in.)

Dana
Hey.

Casey
Hey.

Dana
Where’s Dan? We don’t have any decent film for Houston yet and he—

Casey
Have you seen this?

Dana (smiling)
Yeah. We did well this year, huh?

Casey
You’ve seen this and you didn’t tell me? How the hell do you explain that!

Dana
I actually explain it quite easily, Casey.

Casey
Well please explain it to me, Dana.

Dana (smiling and walking out)
I don’t answer to you.

Casey (relenting and following her out)
Well, that’s technically true. But still you should at least—

Dana (she turns to face Casey but continues walking backwards through the newsroom)
Technically it’s true? Oh, I’ll tell you something mister, it’s more than technically true. It’s true in practice. Watch. I’ll show you. See me? (she gestures to herself) Not answering to you?

Casey
Yes, Dana, you’re a sight to be seen.

Dana (smiling and pulling Casey into the editing room)
Why do you care? So Dan got nominated for Sports Personality of the Year. You and he both got nominated for Sports Anchor of the Year and everyone knows you’re a shoo-in since Steve Sisko took half the year off last year, so why do you care?

Casey
I don’t know.

Dana
You’ve always been the one saying Dan doesn’t get the credit he deserves for his work on the show. You’ve always said you can’t believe he gets nominated for awards that he doesn’t win.

Casey
I know.

Dana
Then why do you care?

Casey (shaking his head)
I don’t know.

Dana
I’m going to figure out what to do about Houston.

Casey (slightly befuddled)
I’m gonna…yeah.

(Dana looks at him sympathetically as she walks out. When she leaves he mutters to himself.)

Casey
Damn lamony.

Newsroom—Kim and Elliot are arguing.

Kim
I was hired in August—it couldn’t have been me.

Elliot
No. Phil was hired first, though.

Kim
Wait…OK, what did he say exactly?

Jeremy
What are you guys doing?

Elliot
Jeremy, have you heard any rumors that someone on the production team wasn’t supposed to get hired?

Jeremy
What do you mean?

Kim
Dave gave us all this pep talk before the show last night when we thought the show was being can—

Elliot
Don’t say it!

Kim
Oh, god, Elliot!

Elliot
It’s bad luck. Now that the show’s been saved we can’t say the C-word—it’ll curse us.

Kim

You're psychotic.

Elliot
You say that now.

Kim (sweetly)
I can say it later, too, if you like.

Elliot
Just say when the show “almost got a new caterer.”

Kim
Yeah, cause that makes so much sense.

Elliot
OK, what do you think we should call it?

Jeremy
Is there any reason for me to be here right now?

Kim
Jeremy, when the show almost got (she rolls her eyes) a new caterer, Dave mentioned that someone on the production team almost didn’t get hired. Do you have any idea who that was?

Jeremy
I really don’t.

Elliot
Don’t you care?

Jeremy
Uh, not as such, no.

Kim (glares at him)
You can go now.

(In the editing room, Dana is now sitting with Natalie. Natalie is sitting at the editing machine and Dana is behind her on the couch.)

Dana
So what are you going to do?

Natalie
I don't know.

Dana
Well, what do you want to do?

Natalie
I don't know.

Dana
What do you know, Natalie?

Natalie
I know you don't have footage for Dan for Houston and I know you're not going to get any if you're not nice to me.

Dana
Is this film even going to work? You said there’s barely anything on it.

Natalie
Well, that’s true, but we’re going to have to make it work….(turning to face Dana) I just don't want to put myself out there again.

Dana
But it's Jeremy. You know how he feels about you.

Natalie
(turning back around)
You knew how Casey felt about you for ninety days last year and wouldn't do anything about it until he kissed you.

Dana
How did this become about me?

Natalie (smiling)
I lash out when I'm feeling defensive. I don't want to think about this anymore. Have you seen the list?

Dana
Yeah, we did really well this year! Congratulations, too, by the way, because the segment on the World Series was yours.

Natalie
Thanks! We’ve never done this well—six nominations is really something. Even if it is only the SPAs.

Dana
Of course it’s something! We should be proud! Do you think it would be obnoxious to send Luther Sachs an invitation with “Ha, Ha, Ha” written on the back.

Natalie
Maybe a little.

Dana
I just feel like I’m entiled to gloat a little. He gave up on us! She we get to rub his nose in it?

Natalie (absently)
Rub away. Oh! Wait! Here’s something! (She gestures for Dana to look at the screen.) Well, it’s not of the actual game, but the fans are cheering so something must have happened.

Dana
You know, maybe if there’s an entire game that was exciting enough to earn itself a 30 second spot on our show, we should consider hiring someone to, oh I don’t know, actually film the game.

Natalie
Well, I think that’s maybe something you should bring up at a meeting with someone.

Dana (chuckling)
Yes, I suppose I should. And I guess I shouldn’t get too far ahead of myself with that gloating just yet.

Casey and Dan’s office—Dan is writing when Casey walks in.

Casey
(In a slightly strained voice) So, congratulations.

Dan
Hm? Well good morning, Case. (He looks up at Casey curiously and then back down at the computer as he continues to type). Thanks, congratulations to you, too. Why do you sound weird?

Casey
I don’t. I’m just—what I can’t congratulate you? It’s the first time since we started the show that you got nominated for an award I didn’t get nominated for. I’m just saying congratulations.

Dan
Is that why you were congratulating me? Because I thought it was just for getting nominated at all.

Casey (shrugging)
Yeah. That’s what I meant.

Dan (staring at him for a second before dropping the gaze and looking down at his computer)
No, I don’t think that was what you meant.

Casey
No kidding, Danny, that impression of my ex-wife is getting uncanny.

Dan
Why are you being a jackass?

Casey
I just came in here to congratulate you. I’ve done that, and now I just want to do my job.

Dan
This is crap, Casey.

Casey
God, Dan, you know—

Dan
No! (He stands up and folds him arms) You know, when you made that list last month, I at least supported you—

Casey
When I made that list you had a level three nervous breakdown. And that’s not what this is so—

Dan
That’s exactly what this is, Casey, and it’s bullsh—

(Natalie walks in)

Natalie
Hey guys.

Casey
Hey.

Dan
Hey Natalie.

Natalie
You guys saw the list, right? (She grins) We did really well this year.

Dan
Yeah.

Casey
We saw it.

(Their answers overlap each other and they both sound tense)

Natalie
You guys realize by “list” I’m not talking Schindler’s, right? I mean the list of nominees for the SPAs. (Both Casey and Dan look at her solemnly. She takes the hint and backs out). Run down’s in five minutes.

(As Natalie walks out she runs into Jeremy. She steps to her right as he steps to his left and they are still in each other’s way. They each try the other direction and the same thing happens.)

Jeremy
We really should talk, Natalie.

Natalie
We have run down in five minutes, Jeremy.

Jeremy relents and lets her go by.

(The staff enters the conference room. Issac and Dana sit at the heads of the table, Natalie sits next to Dana and Jeremy sits next to Natalie, prompting Natalie to hiss “Not now, Jeremy.” He moves to the other end of the table. Casey and Dan walk in together but sit nowhere near each other.)

Dana
Alright, this should be quick. We’re teasing the new Kobe-Shaq quotes instead of the Ryder Cup so I need you guys to write a new intro. (She is met with silence, so she continues.) Plus, we need to cut Houston to 20 seconds because we really just don’t have a lot there. (Again, silence.) Is that alright, Dan?

Dan
Yeah. That’s fine.

Dana
Don’t you want to know why we need to cut it down?

Dan
Why, yes, Dana, if you feel the need to tell me.

Dana (smiling and glancing at Natalie)
Well, it turns out that the cameramen, in their infinite wisdom, decided to focus all of their camera time on such salient details as the crowd, the referees, and, no kidding, two kids in the front of the stands who were playing video games during the entire second half of the game. (She chuckles.) Natalie and I are having a really interesting time finding any film with…what is with everyone today?

Dan
Nothing. Sorry. That’s…it’s funny. (He gives her an attempted smile.)

Dana
OK. Fine. (She looks around confused, but starts to scan her rundown.) So…cutting Houston back…and…we’re still about a minute fat in the 40s

Natalie
Is that before or after the ten-second cut of Houston?

Jeremy
It’s before.

Dana (Smiling, pleased that someone is actually speaking)
No. Actually, it’s after. We still need a minute back from somewhere.

Natalie
If you’re going to interrupt Dana answering me, Jeremy, can you at least try and get the answer right? (She glares at him)

Jeremy
Sorry, boss.

Natalie
Yeah.

(Issac eyes them and looks up quizzically at Dana)

Dana
OK, seriously, you guys—

Kim
Dana?

Dana
Yeah?

Kim
When you get a chance, I really need you to—

Dana
You know what? We can do it now. Whatever it is, whatever you need, it just got moved up on the agenda. What’s up, Kim?

Kim (looks sheepish)
We need to talk about what we want to say to refer to the show almost getting cancelled.

Elliot
Kim!

Kim
Elliot thinks we should say, “when the show almost got a new caterer.” I think we should call it “the blackout” or something that sounds cooler. What does everyone else think?

(Dana looks blankly from Kim to Elliot)

Kim
You want to move it back down to the bottom of the agenda, don’t you?

Dana
Yeah, I really do.

Elliot
But, specifically, is it my thing or Kim’s thing—

Dana
Um, yeah, we’re done here. But can whatever issue you are all having with each other please stop affecting, you know, my life?

Natalie
Back at noon.

Isaac looks at Dana

Isaac
Well, this oughta be a fun show.

Dana
You’re telling me.

Newsroom—Dana is reading a script when Natalie walks up.

Dana
Natalie what is this? This script is horrible. It’s not funny, it’s barely even cohesive.

Natalie
Yeah. Dan and Casey aren’t speaking to each other.

Dana
They’re not speaking to each other?

Natalie
They are not.

Dana
How are they not—

Natalie
They’re not.

Dana
This is ridiculous. Someone please remind them that this isn’t day care. Talk to them. Actually, I need you on Phoenix. Have Kim talk to them. And find out why Jeremy missed the noon rundown.

Natalie
I sent him out on assignment.

Dana
Where?

Natalie
New Jersey.

Dana
What’s in New Jersey?

Natalie (sounding not at all surprised or upset)
Oh no. I must have misspoke. There is nothing going on in New Jersey.

Dana
Where should you have sent him?

Natalie (shrugging)
I don’t know…the studio, probably.

Dana
Natalie!

Natalie
He’ll be back soon. (Dana gives her a look.) I’ll tell Kim to talk to Dan and Casey.

Dana (frustrated)
Great.

Casey and Dan’s office—Casey is sitting at the computer typing when Kim walks in.

Kim
Dana wants to know what’s going on with you and Dan.

Casey
Nothing.

Kim
OK. Don't you think Elliot's whole "new caterer thing sounds siller than--

Casey

Get out.

(She walks out and Casey keeps typing.)

Newsroom—Jeremy walks in after having made the trip to New Jersey and back. He heads for the editing room where Dan is sitting at the editing machine when Jeremy walks in.

Jeremy
Sorry. I didn’t know anyone was in here.

Dan
No problem. I’m just looking at tape. What’s up?

Jeremy
Nothing. I just needed a minute to…I don’t know.

Dan
Yeah. I know the feeling.

Jeremy
Oh, hey, congratulations about the SPAs.

Dan
Thanks. You too—we did really well this year.

Jeremy
So…

Dan
So…you’re blowing it with Natalie.

Jeremy
Did she talk to you?

Dan
No. I just know these things.

Jeremy
Right. Well, I don’t know how fix this.

Dan
Why don’t you tell her how you’re feeling? Tell her you love her.

Jeremy
It’s just…I think the problem that she’s having right now has less to do with her desire to hear me say I love you than she thinks it does.

Dan
What do you mean?

Jeremy
When I’m with Natalie I feel like I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop. She’s smart and sexy and amazing—

Dan
And your boss.

Jeremy
You’re helping now?

Dan
Sorry.

Jeremy
She knows I love her. I’ve waited my whole life to meet someone as amazing as she is who isn’t overly concerned with what a dork I am.

Dan
Ah, the eternal struggle. So you found her, what’s the problem?

Jeremy
She’s too good for me. And I think she knows it. And I can’t help but think her concern right now doesn’t have something to do with…I don’t think she expects to have to…

Dan (realizing)
You think she’s pissed because she had to say it first.

(Jeremy is quiet and Dan pauses and considers this for a moment. A small smile spreads across his face as he comes to a realization.)

Dan
You’re wrong.

Jeremy
I’m not.

Dan
I think you are. I gotta go. (Dan starts for the door, but he stops in the doorway and faces Jeremy). But even if you weren’t, just tell her. It’s just pride and it’s not worth it. You wanna know how I know?

Jeremy
How?

Dan
Because nothing ever is. (Dan leaves and Jeremy watches him go.)

Newsroom—10:45pm

Dan is walking toward their office and Casey is walking away from it. They almost walk into each other. They stop and stare for a moment.

Dan
We need to talk.

Casey
We need to get to makeup.

Dan
We need to do this first.

(Casey turns and walks back into the office and Dan follows and closes the door.)

Dan (Dan smiles a knowing smile.)
Screw the Laker Girls.

(Casey gives Dan a look as Dan realizes what he just said.

Dan
That was unfortunate phrasing. I just meant—you know, how in Love Story, when she’s about to die and she says screw Paris—

Casey
Are you trying to tell me you’re dying of cancer or that you’re in love with me?

Dan
You think I regret not going. And that somehow this nomination proves that I could have made it without you. And you’re being like this because you’re afraid I’m going to decide I don’t want to be in your shadow anymore now that I have options.

Casey
Danny, you’re not—

Dan
No, I mean it. Not in a dramatic “I’m bitter” way. But I am. And I know it. But I know this too. I would do this show—our show—with you over anything else in the world.

Casey
Look, I know how it must have looked. But I swear this wasn’t that. I don’t think I’m better than you.

Dan
I know you don’t. I do. And I’m working on that.

(They stare at each other for a moment and then Casey begins to shift uncomfortably.)

Casey
So we’re not gonna hug or anything now are we? Because this conversation’s getting a little too…

Dan
Case, I just figured out what was going on with us because Natalie and Jeremy are having the exact same fight.

Casey
So hugging is maybe the thing we should be least concerned about?

Dan
Yeah.

Casey
So, hey, congratulations on the SPAs.

Dan
Thanks. We did really well this year.

Casey
Yeah.

Dana (running in)
Do you guys know anything about there not being any food?

Casey
Uh, yeah. The crafts services people…I think they’re striking.

Dana (realizing)
Oh no!

(Dana runs through the newsroom and finds Elliot and Kim arguing in the studio.)

Kim
That doesn’t make sense, Elliot!

Dana
You guys!

(They both look up.)

Kim
Yeah?

Elliot
Yeah?

Dana
Have you guys been using the “new caterer” thing around the crafts service people?

Kim
Um, probably.

Dana
That’s it!! Senior staff. Conference room. Now!

(She runs into the newsroom.)

Dana
Senior staff!! Someone get Isaac, check the studio and the editing room, and get in the damn conference room—everyone—now!

Natalie
Dana, we have five minutes.

Dana
Then you all better move fast.

(One by one, everyone sheepishly files into the conference room. The room is tense and people don’t look happy. Isaac sits down across from Dana and nods at her.)

Dana
Look, I don’t know what’s going on here, but it needs to stop. I get it. You’re scared. You’re relieved. You regret saying whatever it is you all said to each other and now you’re all so freaked out that you can’t wrap your heads around exactly what has changed and what hasn’t. But I need you to snap out of it. No more stupid fights and no more distractions. I need my team back. All of you. And I need you to bring your A-game.

Elliot
Dana—

Dana
Elliot, so help me if you say one word about a caterer—

Elliot
Different question. All of that actually started because Dave said that someone on the production team wasn’t the first choice for job. It’s driving us crazy. Who was it?

Dana
I honestly have no idea, Elliot. You were all my first choice for your jobs. (She looks at Dave.)

Dave
I heard the rumor a long time ago.

(On the other end of the table, Isaac chuckles.)

Dana
Isaac?

Isaac (smiling)
You know this, Dana. It was you. Dana wasn’t my first choice for her job. But she was my last choice. And that’s really all that matters. You know, my daughter asked me the other day why it is that what every religion has in common is a creation story. It’s just as possible to organize a faith around beliefs about what’s happening now or what will happen in the future as it is to organize one about beliefs about what happened then. But human beings are so convinced that how we got here means so much more than it actually does. (As he speaks the group begins to relax and starts to look more like themselves). That if you weren’t the first choice, maybe you’re not the best. Or if we almost got cancelled, then maybe we don’t deserve to be on the air. That how we got here determines why we’re here. Or what we can accomplish while we’re here. But it doesn’t. We get to do that.

Natalie
Dana. We’ve seriously got, like, a minute and a half.

Dana (looks over the group quickly and smiles)
Let’s go. Let’s do our jobs.

Natalie
The script still sucks.

Dan
We can redo the intro during VTR.

Dana
And you can fix up at least some of the upcoming segments during commercial breaks.

Jeremy
It’s not going to be our best show.

Dana
It doesn’t have to be.

Natalie (looks up at Dana and smiles at her)
Jeremy. Let’s talk after the show?

Jeremy
Yeah. OK.

(Natalie walks out of the room and while her back is to him, Jeremy calls out.)

Jeremy
I love you.

Natalie (turns and smiles)
I love you too.

Jeremy
I know.

Dana (walks by Isaac and squeezes his arm)
Thanks, Isaac.

Cut to Control Room—everyone is in their usual places chattering happily.

Dave
Let’s try and pull this off!

Dana
Natalie. What happens next? I mean, after lamony, then what?

Natalie
Well that’s the weird thing.

Dana
What?

Natalie (smiling thoughtfully)
Nothing. Nothing happens. We just keep…living.

(With that, Dana looks around and notices the sounds of the pre-show)

Kim
One minute to VTR two minutes live!

Jeremy
I’m going to need a shot sheet before the 30s.

Kim
We’ll get it.

Dan (smiling)
Good show.

Casey (smiling)
Good show.

Natalie
Preview animation.

Will
Animation’s up!

(Fade out)

Welcome

2006-06-18T12:01:00.000-07:00

Hey Sports (Night) fans!

So I came late to my obsession with Sports Night, which is why after it's been off the air for five years I have decided to create a season three. It's written to take place right after season two, so the year is 2000-01. I tried to stay true to the sports events that were happening at that time (though there is a Winter Olympics episode even though the Winter Olympics were in 2002, not 2001). This is my first crack at fanfiction and it's been fun! I hope you enjoy reading and I'll try to update weekly!

Obligatory disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters and am not in any way affiliated with Aaron Sorkin or Sports Night. I do not have permission from anyone to write a season three of Sports Night. However, I realize that if you want to sue me, this statement won't stop you for a second. So I'll try a different tack: It's fanfiction. Seriously. Get over it.